I wish I was
by MrsChaucersSquire
Summary: This is set near the beginning of the episode “Higher Power. It is a Lucas and Bridger surrogate father son scene.


This is set near the beginning of the episode "Higher Power." It is the scene in which Lucas's dad had just given power to the entire world and the Seaquest main crew is watching the lights go on across the bay while standing on the beach. Lucas is mad. Lucas has been angry the entire episode because his Dad has not called in a year. Lawrence has been so busy creating power for the whole world, he has disregarded his son. Lucas sees the world power project as being the thing that has taken his father away from him.

The story takes place at the point in the episode when the power has just gone on and everyone is watching the lights in celebration. Captain Bridger looks over at Lucas touches Lucas's shoulder because he can tell Lucas is pissed. Lucas just turns and walks towards the hut in the background (The hut looks like some sort of beach restaurant to me). Captain Bridger turns from Lucas and looks back at the rest of his crew celebrating. Bridger seems upset that Lucas is hurting and unsure what to do.

Story is from first person and is from Captain Bridger's Point of view.

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I look back towards Lucas. He is almost at the restaurant now. Poor kid-- he must feel really alone now that everyone in the world is celebrating and he isn't. I'm not sure I know what to say but I really need to go talk to him.

I lean over to Kristien. "I'm going to talk to him." I say as I point towards the restaurant in which we'd been having drinks at before we came out to watch the power go on.

I walk down the sandy beach contemplative as I plan what I should say when I get there. I'm not sure how I should start the conversation but am fairly sure I know how Lucas will react. He is always angry when he is hurt and he doesn't aim his anger correctly. When Darwin was kidnapped he got mad at me because I was the one he was talking to. I have really got to teach him to make sure he takes his anger out on the person it is meant for. I know he has had multiple troubles because of his misdirected outbursts.

I walk in to the hut. It is completely disserted except for Lucas and the bartender. Everyone is out on the beach watching the lights. Lucas is at our table, drinking out of what is defiantly not his glass. Okay, calm down Nathan. Lots of teenager try drinking I think to myself.

"What do you think your doing?" I ask him with my eyebrows raised.

"Having a drink." He spits back at me with a glare.

I look up at the bartender who shrugs his shoulder while cleaning a glass. "Hey Mac, Call me a cab." I say to the burly man. The bartender nods.

I turn back to my surrogate son. I am still standing next to the chair he is slouching in. "We are going back to the Motel." I say as I take the glass out of his hand. "That stuff isn't good for you at your age." I add as a second thought.

He really hates being reminded of his age and so he glares up at me again. "What do you care, you're not my father."

There goes that misdirected anger again. I breathe out while counting down from 10. I tell myself I need to be calm with him. He's not angry at me, he is hurt because of his father. He even knows he was wrong to yell at me because he is now staring at the glass of alcohol trying not to look at me.

I kneel beside his chair to get at eye level with him. It can't help our conversation that I am standing above him. When I am down to eye level with him I gently lift his chin and turn his face towards mine. He glares and I push my self to continue with my mission. My other hand goes to the back of his chair, over his shoulder. "No, I'm not your father." I say with a pause. I slide my hand to back or his neck and start stroking. "But I wish I was" I add with conviction.

His eyes go wide for a moment, as does his mouth, and then they snap shut. Tightly shut. His breathing increases and the breaths are deep. He is trying to squash his feelings. He doesn't want to be week. His body does a little convulsion, a sort of half hiccup, from trying to stop his tears. Then he crumples into me. His arms go above my arms and around my neck and he buries his head in my collar. His tears wet my shirt as he cries. One of my hands continues to stroke the back of his head while my other arm holds his body as tight against mine as possible without crushing him.

How could anyone hurt this child I think for the millionth time.

I look over his shoulder and see that a number of the Seaquest members are heading for the hut. As Ben Krieg steps in I mouth the word "out" to him. His eyes go wide at the site of Lucas in my arms and he very quickly redirects the rest of the crew away from the restaurant. Lucas would die of embarrassment if anyone saw him like this.

Lucas has grown quiet except for the occasional hiccup now. He makes no move away from me though. The bartender walks in and looks at my situation. "Hey buddy, your cabs ready" he says softly.

"Come on kiddo." I say standing up. "Time to go back to the Hotel, okay" He nods at this comment but still stays attached to me as we walk to the cab.

He sleeps most of the trip and I am once again half carrying him to his room. When I get to our hall I think about putting him in his room and then decide not to. I think I would feel better if he were with me tonight.

So I lead him in my room and he collapses on my bed. I take his shoes off and move his legs up. I grab a cover from the closet to cover him.

"Good night Kiddo" I whisper.


End file.
